a mission: to write a book!

Now, that is what i called a proper mission. I have been wanting to write a book. Any kind of book. Perhaps a storybook for children which have good values in them.

I will never put Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and the disney lots as an educational-good value-enriching stories. NO, definitely not. These stories are pretentious stories that promotes good looks as being 'superior' and kissing are allowed before marriage. It cultivates envy and princes and princesses (monetary possesions) are more attractive than being noble and trustworthy.

Now that I will iAllah raise a child of my own, I am starting to see all these things in a different view. Malaysia needs better children stories, which are based on Islamic morales. Hopefully, by reading these feel good value nurturing sories, they will grow up with all these good values in mind. (re: not thinking plastic surgeries are the only way to get a good spouse/job offer, or kissing a guy can cure any illness!).

well, wish me luck peeps. I think I will need loads of them lucks. With your prayers, perhaps your kids will enjoy books that I've written with the Quran, Sunnah, and prophets stories as guidance ;) iAllah.

Luqman

"Verily the knowledge of the Hour is with Allah (alone). It is He Who sends down rain, and He Who knows what is in the wombs. Nor does any one know what it is that he will earn on the morrow: Nor does any one know in what land he is to die. Verily with Allah is full knowledge and He is acquainted (with all things)" -verse 34

Oh God.. Oh God..

Today is really not my day. I guess God wants to test me and test my patience. For without these tests, how can we earn good points to fly us into Jannah?

The followings are the unfortunate events that happened today (so far)
1. Took the wrong turn to work today. Ended up in traffic jam, in the heavy rain, and ultimately late to work.

2. Grazed someone's car in the hospital parking lot! It was a small graze of ~3cm on the left bumper. But its a really nice car (luckily NOT an expensive imported type). I have left my contact details on his/her windshield. I hope whoever the owner of the car is a nice gentle person, and I am willing to pay for compensation, of course.. but the thought of spending my salary on such a stupid mistake when I am due to deliver anytime soon is a huge let down. I was completely out of mood and my mind was wandering to the silly graze on the nice car the whole day!

3. I am going home to day to unclog the stupid kitchen drain. Its a smelly, dirty tiring job to do after work when u are heavily preggers, but - its got to be done! I am preparing myself with gloves, perfumes, and mouthcovers.

4. Still in no luck trying to find a suitable nursery/nanny for this coming soon baby. And my stress level has never been this high since.. since A&E time in the UK. I know this because of the constant heartburn (and of course the huge tummy is a contributing factor too), and blemishes are popping out, and I am feeling restless, and insomniac at times, careless (hence the graze on someone's car)!
And the worse thing is.. I feel like I am ALONE in this hunt for a suitable, safe nursery for my child. And now it's like fighting a losing battle. I am tired because of lack of sleep and pregnancy, and have to wander around in my car after work in search for this illusive nursery.

sigh sigh sigh

I hope I will be stronger and more patient coming out from these tests. I am praying that God will point me towards the best nursery and He will look after my child and will keep her/him safe. I pray that the owner of the grazed car will forgive me and is a nice person. I pray that the clogged up drain will be opened today. I pray that I am always in His mercy and blessings. Please help me and make me happy again..

hubby's back!

Alhamdulillah.

I have noticed now that I countlessly found myself in a state of continuous blessings from Allah. And I believe it isnt just me. You too are blessed by Him, the AlMighty.

My hubby's back yesterday from his 5 days trip to the states for company's meeting. His trip.. was not as smooth-sailing as I hoped it'll be.

To begin with, his flight was delayed, and consequently, he missed his connecting flight to San Diego from Los Angeles. He ended up having to stay the night in LA (thankfully the airline's supporting food and lodgings for the night).

The next day, the tsunami hits Japan, and knowing that the wave will arrive at the Pacific Coast of the states, I was crazy worried! Not knowing the time difference between here and San Diego (I thought it's only 12 hours)- I rang him only to wake him up at 3am to warn about the coming tsunami! No thanks to me, he ended up wide awake until meeting time. (yesterday, not enough sleep due to the delayed flight etc etc). And Alhamdulillah, the waves that hit the coast were only 2 feet high. So much of palpitating and worrying.

However, in the mercy of God, he is now safe and sound in Malaysia. ( Despite his worries about radiation emitting into the plane when flying over Japan to Malaysia-lol). And I got myself a new handbag! :D

I love you hun! And I love the new handbag too :D

"Therefore remember Me, I will remember you, and be thankful to Me, and do not be ungrateful to Me" Al-Baqara [2:152]

5 days w/o hubby

My beloved hubby is going for a meeting in the states tomorrow for 5 days. And, since I am heavily pregnant, tagging along is out of question. Bo Hoo! (there goes my shopping spree plan) And because people keep saying that the baby might pop out anytime soon, I am staying at my parents place for the next few days until hubby is back. *sigh* (thinking about braving through the traffic jam along LDP again) (esp. on the stupid Sunway tol!)

I should count my blessings really. Imagine if I dont have transport and needing to commute using the unreliable super packed busses/LRTs/KTMs *shivers* or not having my parents' place nearby and have to resort to staying on my own for nearly a week *scary*

Anyhow.. to another topic. my mind is split 50-50. I dont know whether it is wise to start working in a hospital or stay in campus until labour. Lots of people are saying its better to stay in campus doing clinics, which I partially agree. And some are saying, its better to go on into Hospital now and see how its like before I have a baby and then have to learn how to cope. ??? ?? ?
I shall leave this to God then. I am praying that He will put in place the best way for me to go, as He always Do. And that option is going to be the best for me now and in the future. Whatever it is.

Til then, I am going to get some food because stomach is alerady hungry and its only 11am! hu. Remember to pray, and pray hard! :)

remember 5 things before another 5

aahh..

i wont delve into the other 4. I will just concentrate on one of them 5.

Health before illness. Well, although pregnancy is not really an illness, now that i am 32 weeks plus, it started to feel like one.

Yesterday, driving to work, I almost fall asleep behind the wheel. My back is aching like nobody's business. I feel energy-less all the time. My calves cramping at night waking me up. O, and not including the waking up in the middle of the night to the ladies room. Its a constant discomfort - the band of my trousers, or the my clothings- everyting. O, and the weight I am carrying with me everywhere I go.
In conclusion; its a phase of aching, tiredness, sleepiness, and discomfort. For another month and a half.

This makes me wonder how on earth my mother went through this 7 times? With small children to chase around too? I am thankful that my mother is who she is. Without her, I probably cry my eyeballs out and shout at all the stupid cars that cut the line (when queing for the contra lane on LDP) ugh!

I am thankful to God, for without Him, I might have lost my sanity. And I am holding on to His reminder, " after each trials, there is relief". I am reminding myself that patience is a virtue, meaning more plus points to bring me to heaven. I am reminding myself that I can actually die during labour, and I dont want the last memories my family have of me are the shouting crazy me. And I dont want my child to feel the stress of this worldly life even before s/he's born.

And also, I should be thankful for having this chance to become a mother. There are millions of women out there who have perhaps tried for many years, to no success in concieving.

I hope I can survive this 1-ish month more of trials, and finally be blessed with a health, happy, perfect little angel. Amiin :)